Secret Son, Convenient Wife Page 5

  The only people to stay were Peggy and Clive, and they were in separate quarters at the back of the house. Upstairs, she and Tate found Peggy’s daughter on the floor playing with Nathan. It was a lovely picture, but as soon as Nathan saw them, he quickly crawled toward them.

  Tate met him halfway and scooped him up. “Hey there, little man.”

  Gemma was happy to see father and son together, but she couldn’t help feeling a little weird. With the whirlwind of a wedding, she hadn’t had the chance to think about Tate moving in on her territory. It had always been she who had scooped up Nathan. She who had received the first cuddle. Well, the only cuddle, really. There hadn’t been any competition before.

  Peggy’s daughter left them to go back downstairs with her parents, and Tate’s gaze flickered over Gemma’s wedding gown. “I’ll keep an eye on Nathan while you change.”

  She nodded and left the room. Last week he’d paid for the delivery of a wardrobe of expensive clothes. Thankfully, the sort of things she liked herself. Of course, what woman would say no to a new wardrobe? Especially when her clothes had been starting to wear thin.

  Going into the other room, Gemma closed the door between them. Her hands shook as she changed into black slacks and a knit top, the quality of which couldn’t be denied. They were so different from the blue jeans and T-shirts she’d always slipped into when she got home to her apartment.

  Home was now with Tate.

  Lord help her.

  All at once she was aware of Tate’s deep voice as he talked to his son in the other room. His voice alone used to make her knees wobble. Just as they were wobbling now.

  His brief, detached glance didn’t calm her nerves when she stepped back into the other room to find the two males playing on the floor.

  Tate pushed to his feet and headed for the door. “I’ve got a couple of things to do. Call through to the kitchen when you’re ready for dinner. Peggy will be happy to stay with Nathan if he’s still awake.”

  Cold feet got the better of her. “Wait!” She swallowed as he stopped. “Thank you, but I’d prefer to eat in my room tonight, if you don’t mind.”

  His eyes turned frosty. “But I do mind.”

  “Tate, look.” She tried to think. “Can’t you let me have some time to myself? It’s been a hectic day.” It was an excuse, but it was a valid one.

  “I’d be glad to leave you to it, but my mother arranged for Peggy to cook a special dinner in the small dining room, heaven knows why. So you’re going to come down and we’re going to eat it together. We start as we go on. Right?”

  She could see he wasn’t about to relent. She nodded. “Right.”

  “I’ll see you downstairs at seven. If you want anything, call Peggy. She’ll make sure you and Nathan have whatever you need.” He twisted on his heels and left the room—and left her wondering how she would get through the evening.

  At seven, Gemma went down to the smaller of the dining rooms, having changed into a dress for the occasion. Oh, she was going to be such a good little wife…in that respect anyway, she thought with a touch of cynicism. She’d follow instructions as necessary, and in public she’d be accommodating whenever it came to putting on a wifely show, but that was as far as it went. He’d coerced her into this marriage. She wasn’t going to pretend to be happy about it.

  Tate’s eyes reflected fleeting approval, but all he said was, “He’s asleep?”

  “Yes.” It had taken a while to get Nathan settled, but she had the baby monitor with her now and didn’t have to worry about him waking up without her hearing. “He settled down. He just needed to have a cry.”

  “Don’t we all,” Tate mocked as he held out the seat for her.

  Her heart lurched. The newness of her wedding ring suddenly weighed down her finger. She took a quick peek at his ring finger. Did he feel it as heavily?

  The heated food warmers held an array of steamed vegetables and roasted meats, and a delicious-looking dessert. “It looks delicious,” she said. Soft music played in the background, but it wasn’t soothing.

  “My mother thought we could do with something substantial after today.” He sat down opposite her and poured some champagne. “Clive tells me there was barely any food in your apartment.”

  The words took her by surprise. She didn’t want him to know how little food she had on hand. She’d lived on canned goods and bread. It was amazing what a person could do with a can of beans.

  “He only mentioned it in passing yesterday,” Tate added.

  “He reports everything back to you, does he?” she said, already knowing the answer. “I didn’t have time to shop, that’s all.”

  Tate considered her. “You should eat more now. You could do with a little extra weight.” He stared a moment more, then lifted his glass to her. “To us.”

  She could do with a drink of water rather than more alcohol. “You don’t have to toast us, now that we’re alone. It’s not a proper wedding, Tate.”

  “Isn’t it?”

  She gave a soft gasp. “You don’t mean—”

  His face closed up as he put down his glass. “No, I don’t mean that at all. I won’t be sleeping with you tonight, Gemma. Not tonight, nor any night in the foreseeable future. I don’t know if I can.”

  The ability to speak deserted her. He disliked everything about her and didn’t intend to overcome it, not even to exercise the physical desire they’d once shared. Regardless of her fear that she’d be a pushover if they were to make love, a deep hurt rolled through her. It was one thing to know he had a grudge against her. It was quite another to realize the depth of his animosity.

  She raised her chin with a cool stare. “I didn’t ask you to sleep with me, Tate, but at least leave me with some dignity. I may not be the perfect wife, but you don’t have to make me feel like I’m something that crawled out of the gutter.”

  He stiffened. “I’m sorry. I just don’t want you thinking I might be tempted, that’s all.”

  She managed a cynical smile. “Oh, believe me, I know you’re not tempted. But I’m not interested either. So rest easy, Mr. Chandler. Your virtue is intact.”

  “I’m glad we’ve made that clear.”

  “Perfectly.” Willing her hands not to shake, she reached to serve herself some of the vegetables and meat, even though her appetite had disappeared. Tate had said they’d start as they’d go on, and she would make sure she did. Today, tomorrow—it was all about Nathan. She would remind herself of that as often as she could.

  They didn’t talk much as they ate, except for a few things about the wedding. Tate mentioned giving Peggy the night off after such a long day, but Gemma didn’t think for a minute he had any ulterior motives.

  It seemed a long meal and one she didn’t look forward to repeating night after night. It would only remind her of other dinners during their affair when conversation had been easy and led straight to sex.

  Finally they’d finished dessert. She was just about to refuse coffee and make her escape when Tate drew a plain white envelope from his pocket and slid it along the tablecloth.

  Her brows drew together as she picked it up. “What’s this?”

  “The results of the paternity test.”

  The envelope almost fell from her fingers. Then she saw it was sealed. She looked up. “You haven’t read it?”

  “No.”

  Could he be saying he was prepared to take her word that Nathan was his? Her heart thumped as she asked the question. “Why not?”

  “I wanted to prove I would marry you without knowing the results and without taking your word for it. That’s how sure I am Nathan is my son.”

  “I see.” He hadn’t married her because he believed her. He’d married her because he’d believed in himself, in his gut feeling that Nathan was his son. Nothing else. He was saying he didn’t trust her—not even with a truth he himself believed. She’d known Tate felt this way. She’d accepted it. But she felt a fool for doubting it for just this instance.

&nbs
p; “Aren’t you going to open it, Gemma?”

  She hesitated, not because she didn’t know what it would say, but because she was still trying to pull herself together.

  “It doesn’t matter to me if you open it or not,” he continued. “The results are still the same.”

  She had no doubt, but she had to read it—for Nathan’s sake. She quickly opened it, scanned it, then passed the sheet of paper to Tate.

  He didn’t hesitate as he took it from her. Didn’t hesitate as he read it and said easily, “He’s mine.”

  It was a statement of fact.

  “Yes.”

  He sat in the chair and nodded, almost to himself, looking pleased but not surprised. Then he began tearing the paper in half, then quarters.

  Her eyes widened. “What are you doing?”

  “We don’t need to keep any proof.” He let the pieces sprinkle down on the tablecloth.

  Her forehead creased. “But don’t you want your family to know the truth?”

  “They already know all they need to know. I’ve said he’s my son, and they can see he is. I don’t need to show them proof. My word is good enough.”

  It must be wonderful to have a family who believes in you, in what you say and do. She was quite envious of Tate for that.

  And now Nathan would be part of such a family, she reminded herself. Now more than any other time today, she felt she’d done the right thing in marrying Tate. She may not love Tate madly like she’d once thought she did, but it took a special man to offer marriage for the sake of a child not proven to be his. Tate had even begun to love a son without proof that he was the father. For that alone, a small pocket of her heart would always belong to Tate Chandler.

  Four

  Gemma wasn’t surprised that she woke early the next morning. Nathan had slept through the night, and she’d fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. She’d probably even snored, so it was just as well that Tate hadn’t shared her bed.

  Her heart cramped at the thought, as she looked up at a high ceiling as untouchable as her new husband.

  She understood that he didn’t want to share her bed, but it still hurt. It filled her with despair to know she had to live with a man who wouldn’t let himself want her, now nor in the future. She had done nothing wrong!

  It wasn’t fair.

  But did she really want someone who couldn’t trust her? To be truthful, deep down she did still want Tate. She wasn’t in love with him. It was all purely physical. But knowing that didn’t change a thing.

  Thank God physical attraction was something she could teach herself to ignore.

  Starting right now.

  She threw back the covers, glad to escape her thoughts, and sneaked a peek at Nathan, who was still sleeping. She showered and dressed, and by the time she was ready, Nathan was awake and hungry. She quickly clothed him, then took him downstairs in search of food.

  In the kitchen, Tate was eating a bowl of cereal at the island. Her pulse raced, but she tried to ignore it. She’d seen him each morning for the past ten mornings, though his focus had been on Nathan or the wedding or business.

  Today, his hooded eyes told her he had heard her coming.

  “Good morning.” His gaze moved to his son and lit up, filling with a warmth that had once been for her. “How is he this morning?”

  “Hungry.” She couldn’t be jealous of her son, but Tate’s reaction was another reminder that things had changed a great deal between them.

  “He’s a growing boy, aren’t you, sport?” Tate smiled at his son with an indisputable look of fatherly love.

  She wrenched her gaze away. This all could have been so different…should have been so different.

  “Peggy not around this morning?” she managed to say as she carried Nathan into the pantry, where Peggy had put the baby food. More often than not, Gemma fed her son fresh food, but the jars came in handy sometimes.

  “Clive was going to drive their daughter back to the city, so I told Peggy to go with him and take the day off.” He raised his voice to reach her. “They’ll return this evening. I assured her we could look after ourselves.”

  “I’m sure we can.” Gemma was suddenly relieved he couldn’t see her face. This would be the first time she and Tate would be alone—except for Nathan—in the house together since they’d run into each other at the hospital. And they were supposed to be on their “honeymoon,” making the situation seem intimate.

  Tate looked up as she exited the pantry with the food. He put down his spoon. “Here, give Nathan to me while you heat that up.”

  “No, that’s okay. You finish your breakfast. I’ll put him in his high chair.”

  Tate pushed his bowl aside and came toward them. “I’d really like to hold my son, Gemma.”

  He met her gaze, boldly showing her his fatherly side. It gave her an odd feeling, sort of squishy inside. She handed Nathan over without a word and went to heat up some milk to go with the oatmeal. At least Tate didn’t hold back on emotion where their son was concerned.

  “Do you want to feed him?” she asked.

  Tate looked up in surprise. “Sure.” He cleared his throat. “Thanks.”

  It was silly to warm to him just because he wanted to feed his son, but she did anyway. “Okay, put him in the highchair first.” She waited while he fastened the safety belt, then passed Tate the bowl and spoon. “Now just spoon it into his mouth. You’ve seen me do it. It’s easy.”

  Tate scooped up the mushy food, then hesitated. Gemma had to smile. It was amazing that this successful businessman, with confidence seeping from every pore, actually looked nervous.

  “He’s waiting for his breakfast,” she pointed out.

  That pushed Tate into action. He moved the first spoonful toward Nathan, who instantly opened his mouth. Tate’s eyebrows shot up. “Hey, this is easy.”

  Something lightened in the room.

  She gave a soft laugh. “Of course it is.”

  “Clearly he’s an amenable chap,” he said, winking at her. “Must take after me.”

  Gemma wasn’t sure who was more taken aback by that wink—her or Tate. She was certain it wasn’t something he had done intentionally, especially when he averted his eyes again to scoop up another spoonful of food.

  Still, it was nice to have a cheerful mood between them, if only for a few minutes. “Yes, well, he’s hungry right now. You should try getting him to open his mouth when he’s not hungry.”

  Tate slipped another spoonful in his son’s mouth. “I can’t believe that.”

  “You did say he took after you,” she joked.

  Tate’s gaze returned to her, one eyebrow quirking, his eyes amused. “So you’re calling my son and me stubborn?”

  “Obstinate is the word I would have used.”

  “Oh, really,” he drawled.

  Their gazes linked…

  It was like old times…

  Suddenly they were talking on one level but aware of each other on another. She stood close enough to see the attraction flare in his eyes.

  He was the first to break eye contact, turning back to his son. “What are your plans for this morning?” His voice was neutral, as if the camaraderie had never been.

  Disappointment rippled through her, followed by anger at herself. Why be disappointed because their one moment of bonding was over? It couldn’t make up for the rest of the issues between them.

  The rest of their lives…

  And his question made it sound as if he wasn’t hoping to share the day with her either, which was a relief. She could be herself without him around. She didn’t have to defend the person she was.

  “I thought I might take Nathan for a walk around the gardens and down to the lake. It’s a beautiful day.”

  He nodded. “Good idea. He needs fresh air and sunshine. He’s a bit pale.”

  Was there an implied criticism in his words? Was he saying their son hadn’t been getting proper care and attention because she’d been a single, working
mother? If so, that just wasn’t true. He was at a wonderful daycare while she worked, and every weekend she’d made sure Nathan got out and about with her. They went to the beach or a park, or even the local supermarket where she’d do her weekly shopping. He’d always had fun there, charming the cashiers with his smile. Gemma had loved showing him off.

  “I know Nathan can’t go swimming yet,” Tate said, reminding her that the doctor had said it was best to wait awhile before putting Nathan in the water, and even then he would have to wear a special cap to cover his ears. “But the pool is there anytime for you to use. It’s not quite summer, but it’s heated and you won’t get cold.”

  His consideration surprised her. “Thanks. It’ll be nice to have some time to swim by myself.” As soon as she said the words, she held her breath. Would Tate think she had an ulterior motive? Would he think she was suggesting he join her in the pool?

  His eyes closed in on her, but not in the way she might expect. “Gemma, you realize we have to stay here for the full week or it won’t look right?”

  Everything inside her went thud. “I know you don’t want to be with me, Tate. You don’t have to keep telling me.”

  He cursed softly. “You’re losing sight of something. This isn’t about us. I’m doing this for my family’s sake, and in the long run for Nathan.” He allowed a tiny pause. “I thought you were, too.”

  How did he manage to turn everything to his advantage? She gave a sigh. “Yes, of course I am.”

  “Then what’s the problem?”

  There was an empty ache in the region of her heart, but she ignored it. “No problem. You’re the one seeing problems where there’s none.”

  He stared hard, clearly not liking her answer. Then he gave Nathan the last spoonful of food and pushed to his feet. “I’ll be in the study all morning.”

  The chill was back.

  And yet as he went to leave, he stopped to ruffle his son’s hair in a brief but loving caress. Gemma saw the gesture and realized Tate was right. For a moment, she had lost sight of the reason for their marriage. This was about Nathan. She just had to get used to there being nothing for her.